Rehab
As I consider the past before the therapy at the treatment rehab
program, several warning signs were somewhat more apparent. To a high
school student, the alleged signs of warning are more suitably seen as
battle scars, validation, a skewed misinterpretation of youth or a rite of
passage. At the treatment rehab program, I thought back to my high school
years and realized I was an ace at being at the wrong place at the least
appropriate time. What began as experimentation with cocaine, marijuana
and substances was a result of a new method to socialize on weekends.
Before my stay at the treatment rehab program, I thought this was quite
normal as getting buzzed became a natural way of life. There were times my
parents were out of town, and we decided to meet in the woods with some
girls, gather at the park or undeveloped properties to get high or drunk.
That would’ve been an ideal time to consider a treatment rehab program.
The procedure of denial breakdown doesn’t occur in a single day. It was
about two weeks of exposure and beating myself up at the treatment rehab
program to say finally, “I am a substance abuser,” and understand what
that meant. Sometimes it’s difficult to know whether or not I am being
honest with myself. I don’t like to refer to substance abuse as a disease
(I prefer to call it an affliction). However, in many ways it is like a
disease—I suppose that’s why addiction specialists refer to it as such.
Anyway, at the treatment rehab program, I learned that to understand this
visually in regards to the progression of my dependency was to identify
every symptom listed during the first, middle and last stages of the
affliction. I learned at the treatment rehab program that all abusers
experience symptoms differently.
However, it looked as if my physical craving and symptoms of
withdrawal has a rapid progression at my young age. I was able to identify
to a number of subtle additions that are gauges: neglect of food,
increased black-outs, and loss of regular willpower, inability to talk
about the problem, pre-afternoon drinks and tremors.
My psychotherapist offered me the initial steps of my strategy plan at the
treatment rehab program. The plan declared, “Phillip lacks comprehension
of addiction, in evidence of the statement he brought this onto himself
and got what he deserved…Phillip will undoubtedly internalize the
affliction procedure and recognize his severity of the affliction.”
Of course after my primary shock, I was astonished that the
psychotherapist was audacious enough to mention that I lacked
comprehension of my addiction. It was my desire to relax and allow the
professional to do her work at the treatment rehab program. In the
educational part of the treatment rehab program program, I had several
assigned readings. I learned a little bit more about addiction to
substances, the role played in genetic inheritance (if that was to be the
case), and how addiction is progressive, chronic and likely to be fatal.
Essentially, I had plenty of time at the treatment rehab program to
discover evidence that’s time-tested to suggest that addiction to
substances genetically passes and is indeed a disease. In other words, it
is a disorder in the brain which doesn’t dissolve; it just worsens and can
rub you out if you don’t receive suitable treatment. I’m glad I had all
the time in the world at the treatment rehab program because I needed to
continue reading.
At the treatment rehab program, I thought about an incident in high school
where my parents discovered me in pitiful form. It occurred when my
parents went to my sister’s music festival in Youngstown, Ohio and I made
a stupid move. About nine of my friends and I invited four cheerleaders to
my house for a couple of beers packed in ice. We had a pretty good time
and there was no harm done as we cleaned up before my parents arrived.
Then, we made the decision to continue the party with the girls at a tree
farm close-by. As I look back at my life before the treatment rehab
program, it’s hard to imagine I had such audacity…and stupidity. I got
home about ten minutes after my parents and sister returned from
Youngstown.
I was out of it and a friend had to help me to the door. I was not able
to tell my parents what happened to me and they stared at me with their
jaws practically touching the floor. I learned at the treatment rehab
program that an addict gets rid of blame with black-outs. I made that
attempt as I confronted my parents that night. The next morning, I felt
terrible about the concern, shock and disappointment I could see in the
faces of my parents. That certainly wasn’t a part of the criteria. The
treatment rehab program must have been a consideration for my parents. I
would certainly benefit from it.
My answer to adolescent boredom on the weekends was the use of drugs. Not
only was it a way to fill my downtime, but it was able to turn a mundane
night into a vibrant evening. Whether it was a heavy buzz or a few drinks,
the stress vanished and the socializing was easy. Before detoxification at
the treatment rehab program, I felt liberated as substances made life a
breeze. Pleasure was my main focus with substances and reality gradually
became the periphery. The parties I enjoyed before my stay at the
treatment rehab program were more of a mentality than social functions. I
had to rely on substances to enjoy myself, and became dependent socially
on substances during my freshman year in high school. (The physical
symptoms of my alcohol dependence started to reveal itself in college.)
Today, I have achieved sobriety as I lead a productive life as a high
school guidance counselor in Doylestown, Pennsylvania. Thanks to the
treatment rehab program my life is drug and alcohol free.
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